Game Over

I'll miss ya dude. Ridiculously consistent but only occasionally spectacular. Somehow managed to be underrated but overpaid. Good luck wherever you land.

As long as it's not LA.

2010-2011 Schedule Released

So I'm over 2009-2010. Fuck it.

On to 2010-2011, you may have seen the schedule was released today. Snap impressions:

• San Jose starts the season on Friday October 8th in Stockholm, Sweden vs. the hated Columbus Blue Jackets. Make sure to set your alarm clocks... those of you that set your alarm clocks 4 months in advance.
• The legit home opener takes place on Saturday October 16th vs. Atlanta. Atlanta will be playing their 5th game of the season and already out on the road, while San Jose will be knocking off a week of rust and 6000 miles of jet lag! Who's excited to blow the home opener against the shittiest team in the Southeast?!
• We play Detroit at home on 11/30 and 3/3, and Chicago at home on 11/24 and 12/11. Because I know you were going to check anyways.
• Random out of conference games I'm excited for - Toronto on 1/11/11 (numerology FTW) and Washington on 2/17 (maybe, just maybe, I can finally see an Alexander the Great game in person)
• San Jose goes on their annual February odyssey yet again, going to Anaheim, Boston, Washington, Columbus, New Jersey, Florida, Nashville, before finally going back to San Jose. 7600 air miles in 15 days. Fun!
• The biggest schedule news: clearly the Pacific slugfest to close out the season. From March 24th to April 9th, San Jose plays Dallas once, LA and Anaheim twice, and Phoenix three times, without a single non-division game. EPIC. I'm excited.
  

There Might Not Be Any More Hockey...

But you can still see The Karate Kid!....? What? Really Danny?

And fuck Chicago, right in the butt.

So What Do You Do

When your best just isn't good enough?

Now It's Personal

It apparently takes quite a bit to get me to come out of my self-imposed exile. For one, this season I've gotten both a PS3 and a girlfriend, both of which I enjoy spending a lot of time with, moreso than yelling at strangers on the internet.

Also, since I've shut the fuck up, the Sharks have done quite well. I'm not one to mess with good juju.

But then I read this ridiculous bullshit from some limpdicked fuck at a site I won't do the pleasure of linking to (via Pollak's always awesome WTC):

“San Jose? Is that really a city, or just a suburb of San Francisco? Let’s get ourselves out of California, where hockey is an afterthought. Best chance for everybody involved to avert that possible chance for the first hockey finals interrupted by an earthquake.”

Well then.

Yes, San Jose is a city, and a vastly more important one than Chicago now that you bring it up. We shouldn't have to keep reminding people that San Jose is the 10th largest city in the US, which means our fanbase is bigger than 20 other teams in the NHL. We've given the world Google, Craigslist, Ebay, Facebook, Pat Tilman, and Nikki Sixx; Chicago's greatest export is shitty baseball and too much fucking bread on my pizza.

Afterthought? Afterthought?!? You might not have noticed while sucking your own dicks for the last two years, but before Kane and Toews landed in your laps, no one in Chicago gave a shit about the Blackhawks.

Blackhawk rank leaguewide in home attendance (based on raw attendance):

• 2001 - 24th
• 2002 - 23rd
  
• 2003 - 24th
• 2004 - 27th
• 2006 - 29th
• 2007 - 29th
• 2008 - 19th
• 2009 - 1st
• 2010 - 1st

Do not, DO NOT, give me that "frontrunner", "afterthought" bullshit. Everyone in Chicago hated the Blackhawks before Old Man Wirtz died and your team sucked so badly you stumbled ass backwards into 2 franchise-changing players.

And earthquakes? Really? How fucking lazy are you? That's like saying we'd be doing everyone a favor by knocking out the Blackhawks because the whole city might catch on fire. That's just retarded and lazy.

I tell you what, we'll knock out the Blackhawks so you all can go back to figuring out the best way to fellate LeBron James. "Da Bulls", amiright?

Sharks in 7. Fuckers.

Fuck You Flukes

Dan Boyle and Joe Pavelski will not let you decide the fate of the Sharks. Dan Boyle and Joe Pavelski will not be denied.

Go Sharks.

Fantastic Voyage II

It's time again for a favorite yearly tradition - the incredibly wasteful journey of my Sharks playoff tickets!

The tickets start in an undisclosed location, then travel through the many armpits of America, before eventually landing at my front door, ready for anyone to come by and steal. It's like the Amazing Race, but without me winning anything at the end.

At least it was close to a straight line this year:

Sunnyvale, CA, by way of
San Pablo, CA, by way of
West Sacramento, CA, by way of
Mather, CA, by way of
Louisville, KY, by way of
Indianapolis, IN

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