Thursday, January 29, 2009

Selling Ice to Sand People

Take it easy, Carcillo

I really enjoyed this article from Puck Money on why the Phoenix Coyotes can't put asses in the seats. Very comprehensive. After going to a Sharks-Yotes game in Glendale a couple of years ago, I can confirm some of the writer's theories:

  • The stadium is in the middle of fucking nowhere. Imagine driving to Gilroy to watch the Sharks. There you go.
  • Once you actually get there, Jobing.com Arena is actually really nice. It's part of one of those "Maybe if we build stores and restaurants and activities here people will buy our crappy property" developments. You know, like this one. The Arena is built into the ground and is generally a modern, nice looking sports facility. That said, maybe "jobing" isn't the phrase you want associated with your local sports team.
  • Did I mention the stadium is a huge pain in the ass to get to? Here's a mystery for you - Central Arizona is laid out like a giant grid; just parallel and perpendicular streets. How the fuck is there so much traffic? There's no reason to slow down! Just go straight until you need to make a 90 degree turn! Don't go to Coyotes game unless you're prepared to stare at sand and tail lights for 60 minutes.
  • Sand and tail lights might be the peak of the experience for Coyote fans because let's be honest - the on-ice product has been absolute garbage for quite a while now. The Coyotes haven't made the playoffs since 2002. The franchise hasn't won a playoff series since 1987, 10 years before they even moved to the desert.
That last point is horrible, borderline tragic. It's no great mystery as to why the Coyotes have attendance problems - their team sucks. If some random NBA team moved to San Jose and proceeded to crap all over themselves for 10 years, they wouldn't see a dime of my money. That's why I don't agree with Puck Money's conclusion that the Phoenix area simply has no interest in hockey. Put a winner out there, score an upset or 2 in the playoffs, then you'll get those asses in the seats. Just ask the 93-94 Sharks. Or the 2008 Arizona Cardinals.